To my best friend I ever had in my life...

To my very best friend I ever had in my life:

You are indeed my very best friend I ever had in my life, seriously. If you were a girl, I would have married you already.

Thank you. Thank you for everything that you have done for me.

You have shown me that friends aren't what I thought they would be. Many incidents recently have brought across this message to me " Friends aren't who they seem, everything has it's motive..." I started to believe for a moment.

Since young, I was granted quite some power in many aspects of my life due to the various leadership positions I held. I was, in a way or another, popular among my friends; people all wanted to be part of my 'clique'. Like you said "the aura". It's just there, maybe it's my personality or maybe it's my character, I'm not sure anyway. Or maybe be'cose I'm very sucessful in all aspect of my life. Studies, sports, friends, student leader, outspoken, fun-loving. Definitely a guy everybody would want to hang out with.


1) Jarryl on his blog, "So much for trying so hard to be on good terms with him by heading to the students' lounge during recess for a period of time." So you didn't really like to go to the student's lounge? You went thr so that you could get closer to me?

2) Met a few primary school friends recently. Realised that nobody actually contacted me when thr was class gathering. Considering the fact that I was one of the most popular in my class, why hadn't anybody contact me when there was a class gathering? Or was all the 'friendship' a lie? A way for them to get into my clique, a way for them to take advantage of my power I held then?

3) Accidentally tripped Cren during training. He said this at the Mrt, unintentionally of course, " Friends don't trip each other on court." I was furious, I thought he knew it was totally unintentional, I thought we knew each other so well that we will understand that we will never injure one another no matter what. Oya, sry Jarryl... knew how u felt then XD... My fault...

4) Those friends that I thought were my best friends got the lowest score for the quiz. Nigel and Jarryl were the highest, Derek was the lowest... I thought that Derek knew me very well... Was it all a lie only?


When the message started to hover around in my head, I began to wonder. Did all my 'friends' become my friends be'cose they want to be part of the popular 'clique' or be'cose they wanted to take advantage of the power I held? I foolishly believed these thoughts and started to dislike everybody, from Derek all the way to Seh Hian. I wanted to be a loner. I wanted everybody that 'want to take advantage of me' to regret and waste their effort...

More often than not, I always put my friends before me in all situations. I treated them wholeheartedly, with no signs of self-centered-ness. I'm always willing to give but not for any return. I believed that the amount of devotion I put into the relationship decides the outcome of our relationship. BUT, never once anybody did something for me unless I did them a favour for them. Nobody did something which ask for nothing in return. Nobody but YOU...

You helped me regain my confidence in friendship. You shown me that friends aren't what they seem, cose~ they are even better than what you actually think. Thank You.

Your indeed my best friend. You are the very 1st guy which did something for me without asking for any return. If there wasn't a need, I wouldn't even have seen what you have done for me. This is what true friends do. Helping each other in the back, without the person knowing; doing everything without asking for any return or acknowledgement.

You are the very first guy I met whom have done so much for me. I'm always doing it for my friends but hardly anybody realising it. You're the only one which have done what I've done.

In fact you know me better than I know myself.

I think you are closest to yourself.
You want to be a coach.
You aspire to be a writer.
Your darkest period was in sec 2.
And your favourite subject is Geography.

This wasn't my original answers but come to think of it, actually it's true... That was what I'm truly am. I'm closest to myself not my family. I want to be a coach. I want to be a writer more than a movie director, it's be'cose my command of language isn't strong enuf that's why I lied to myself saying " I want to be a movie director." Come to think of it, my darkest period WAS Sec 2, not P5. Grades dropping in sec 2, not very good at floorball then, had little close friends. Geo IS my favourite subject.

Indeed, I keep too much things to myself. When anybody ask " You feeling okay?" I would definitely say " I'm fine" even though I'm not. I don't tell anybody my troubles, I have too many secrets that I'm not willing to share. Those problems on the blog are only the surface, I never once wrote something that was close to my heart. Everything is kept inside.

"I dunno but i feel that you have this special way of making other people feel that you are doing fine. And for awhile i believed it, and i felt INCREDIBLY jealous of you. Yeah, jealous. I couldn't understand how your world could be so perfect, and it just seemed to me that you had everything. Friends, GREAT floorball skills (and dun try to say that its not great, because i know and you know that it is) you had like awesome grades. And like china girls fall for you. Yeah you say she's irritating, but not even irritating ones fall for me.. And like you are also incredibly outgoing and fun to be around. And one more very important thing. You never succumb to anger the way i do."

In eyes of many, I'm like the perfect person to be. The ideal successful 'student alethete'. It's be'cose I've always seem so perfect that I did not want my image to get stained. I wanted to stay perfect in everybody's mind. Nobody in this world is perfect, I'm not perfect too. It's all a lie, I'm like all of you, I'm just better in areas where you can see, imperfect in areas you can't see. I have many secrets that I'm not willing to share, I want to perfect in eveybody's mind.

You taught me something important, to open up. I'm keeping so many things to myself that it's killing me. I need to say everything out. Nobody truly knows me. That was why I created the quiz to find out how much people actually know about me. Truth is, the only person that knew me inside out, other than you and ,Nigel which came close, is myself. I keep too much to myself.

There are so many secrets in my life, many you never heard of, many you will never expect to come from me. I decided to share it with somebody at last, it will be you. I decided, I shall slowly tell you EVERYTHING...

Thank YOU, my best friend I ever had in my life. This is the 1st time in my life I ever came close to saying something close to my heart in this blog.

You shown me what true friendship really means. Although there will still be doubts when I'm with my friends, but you are one that I will never ever doubt. Cose~ your my true friend =)

To U: hehe, your dream finally came true =)