Naked

It was about 11 pm.

Really felt horny. Totally.

Everybody in my house was asleep, except for me...

Masturbating would be the norm but not this time... I decided to do something crazier...

I really felt the need to be naked. And to feel exhilarating at the same time.

Crazy. I did the craziest thing I could have done. Horniest was overwhelming me till I couldn't think properly anymore.

I went over to my drawer and took out my keys. i threw it down the window, into the bushes in the garden below my block. It landed somewhere in the garden.

I stripped naked. I threw my clothes on the sofa. I felt ready. I felt the urge to carry out my plans immediately. It was fun, till the max...

I opened my door warily and glanced around. The corridor was empty. Sound came from my parent's room. I twisted around, dreading myself getting caught before I could even carry out my mission. Luckily they were fast asleep. I suddenly realised the dangers of my mission but I wanted to have fun. Try out something exhilarating.

The next thing I did, you would have punched me, kicked me or slap me even. I closed the door. WTF, I was seriously pushing myself to the extreme... I didn't even allowed myself to back out. I was crazy. My only way back now is to retrieve the keys...

I suddenly came to my senses. WTH was I doing!!! I was crazy, i didn't even allowed myself to back out. I wanted to get things over quickly before I get caught. I immediately climbed down the stairs twice at a time with my hard and erected dick banging against my body as I did. Hurry!!!

Right before I reached the 1st floor I stopped. I spotted 2 Indians sitting there, chatting. They don't seem like the kind that will leave anytime soon. I immediately climbed back to the 2nd floor and made my way to another staircase that will lead me to the 1st floor. This one was clear. I immediately sprinted towards the garden.

Without warning, a Chinese male, with headphones on, turn around a bent and was walking towards me. I quickly ducked behind a wall. Luckily he couldn't hear me or he would have spotted me moving already. It was so close. I really felt vulnerable for once. Totally vulnerable without clothes.

After the guy walked away I continued walking towards the garden, warily...

****. __. Guess what. There was a bunch of girls sitting in that exact garden my key had landed and there was one of them hold the keys and the other rubbing her head furiously. Guess the key have landed on her head and caused a wound or something.

In other words, I was dead, finished. How was I going to get the keys back. PLUS, among them, the one holding the key was my primary school friend Cynthia and the other was the girl whom I like that lived in the same block as me. What could be worst...

I was really considering my options, which I have only a few at hand.

1) Go back home and bang on my door and wake my parents up who will be surprised to see their naked son standing at the doorstep. Not an option.

2) Walk up to the girls as if nobody's business and snatch over the keys from the terrified/screaming girls after seeing a naked guy. Not that brave.

3) Steal some clothes and after that, negotiate with the girls to get back the keys. Best available option.

So I made my way back to the staircase where I came down from. Guess what. As I was walking up, a girl in her 20s, average looking, walked down. We met face to face. Super embarrassing!!! I could have killed myself there, dig a hole and bury myself. her expression was like " What's this crazy naked guy doing here?" She almost screamed but kept her composure and quickly walked away, glancing back at me as she walked away with the 'what's wrong with him' expression...

I swear that I would have killed myself if I could. Quickly recovering from the incident, I searched level by level for clothes but only managed to find pants and shirt after walking to the 4th level. The lift was carrying people and went passed me as I walked pass the lift lobby. It did not stop and the people inside didn't seem to notice a naked boy hiding in the shadows anyway.

After gaining the extra protection and comfort of somewhat unfitting clothes, I went over the the garden. The girls were already planning to leave, I was hoping to retrieve the keys without the need to approach the girls but it seem to be inevitable since Cynthia was holding the keys in her hands.

I mustered all my courage and walked over, trying to shift my pants to cover up for my embarrassing erected dick which was jutting out.

"Erm... Sorry. That was my key... I.. Dropped it out of the window... So.. so.. can I get it back.?" I stuttered like shyt.

They 5 girls' attention were all focused on me. All seemed to notice my erected dick jutting out uncomfortably but didn't seem to mind.

" You hurt my friend here. Why should I let you go?" she said these in chinese.

"Sorry... Pls return me the keys..." I said with a dry throat. I was starting to feel embarassed, esp in front of the girl which I liked from my block...

Suddenly, I felt my pants dropped. Somebody had pulled it down after realising I wasn't wearing any underwear. My dick was like totally exposed. I felt 'naked'...

I felt angry yet embarrassed. They were all like laugh at me. I felt bad damn. Damn hurt. I quickly pulled my pants up and snatched over the keys from Cynthia's hand. I quickly ran back to the stairs and ran back home. I could hear the faint laughter from the girls as I ran hard, back to my house...

I was too stupid. I was crazy. I swear I'm never gonna do something so stupid AGAIN.

*
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*

"RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGG!" It a brand new Sunday.

Dead tired

I'm dead tired now...

Tuesday night YOG started this whole crap. Caused me a lack of sleep. Wednesday was super tired.

Thursday was worst. Catch a cold and was dying. But still went for training. Didn't train for close to a month since a series of injuries kept me on the sideline...

Today, 2pm -6pm. Non-stop dance practise. Dead tired. At least we were able to complete the whole dance=)

Lucifer dance steps are dead cool. I swear. This song never seems to bore me.

Having a sore throat now. Hope it wouldn't cose me to be ill again...

Gosh, I should be studying and not preparing for Teacher's Day right now... Must not retain. Not all my subjects are above 60 this year. Must work hard. Can't tarry anymore... Not much time left...

Restricted...

That's how I'm feeling now. Squashed and restricted.

Just like this poor panda, I'm caged within time. He is caged by a watch (time), while I'm caged within the limited amount of time I have left for the upcoming EOY.

When life just seemed to brighten up a little, when everything seems like it is gonna be fine for once, comes the crashing weight of the stress of the EOY upon my shoulders.

Darn. Reality is simply cruel...

I already found out what my weakness are and have already started working to overcome them. It will obviously not be completed over a few days but I really have to hurry and get things right FAST. EOY is just round the corner...

I better not tarry anymore. I'm procrastinating too much. I starting to accumulate my homework, just like before. Can't afford to do so. I've already learnt my lesson. Better not repeat that again. But then again, no matter how determined I was to do/start on my work when I reach home, I just seem to falter right before I start my work. It's really very annoying and I can only blame myself for it. I know it's tough for me to change over such a short period of time when this bad habit of mine has been part of my daily life for a year or 2, but at least I have to try overcoming it a little by little. Problem is, I JUST can't seem to overcome this barrier. It's annoying. I keep telling myself to not procrastinate anymore but I just can't seem to carry out whatever I was thinking. My actions and thoughts don't synchronise.

C'mon Darrell, you can do it... Hwaiting!!!

*****

Today's morning have a religious talk for Carpe Diem. Was rather amazed by the ideology and belief of the various religion. I'm not against any religion (free thinker), but I sort of have this vision that a religion is just a bluff/propaganda. This is purely my perception so there is no offense against those with religion. I mean, who can prove that god exist? I vaguely remember something about messenger and angels, like they sorta pass message from god or something, but who can confirm these angels exist in the first place? Even if they really exist, who can prove that that is the actual message from god? I mean that are many things in a religion that we can't challenge. It is like " It's was like this from the start, everybody agrees so it should be right..." conception. Nobody can prove that it is right or wrong. Nobody actually saw god face to face before right?

So how can we actually confirm that god exist? So religion is more like a belief and ideology, nobody can prove it wrong or right. It's holy. You don't believe it then forget it, if you do, continue believing in it. Dead people can't tell us whether they really went to heaven or hell right?

BUT, I would really like to stress that religion is something that brings more good than harm. It really develops you as a person well. It stresses on values and belief. It trains a person well. And when these followers trust their god and know that god is watching over them, it actually builds up belief in them. It builds self-discipline as well, cose for eg, fasting, they can't eat cose they know god is watching and stuff like that. They also think twice before they do anything that is against their religion, which trains self control.

That's why I'm never against any religion as I see it as something good even though I'm still not convince that god exist that's why I have yet to have a religion. Fyi, most of the successful people in the world have a religion... Faith and believe keeps one going.

Bye~

Us

I know the chances of us meeting 2morow is as low as 0.1% but I'm still hopeful.

***

I say no
My mind can't agree better
but my heart isn't with me anymore
it's with you

You stole it long time ago
You stole it without knowing
You stole it before I can't resist
You stole my heart

We stared at each other for 5 seconds
maybe longer...
You should have never done that
Nor should I have continued thinking about you

We live in two different worlds.
You lead your life and I lead mine
We will never cross path
Cose we are treading on different ones

We will never be able to be together
Yet I refuse to accept that
I know it's purely infatuation
But I refuse to let this feeling go

I know I'm foolish
But I rather be foolish than to forget you
Time and time I tried to get you out of my mind
And each time I failed miserably

You live a life that is totally different from mine
So do I
You have your group of social acquaintance
Vastly different from mine

I will never fit in your life
Neither would you fit into mine
But ironically
My life wouldn't be complete without you

I know you aren't that perfect
I refuse to meet you again
Just to be able to retain that perfect image of your's
in my heart

I know I'm foolish
all this one-sided love
I know I'm just wasting time
Just accept the truth
in the face of harsh reality
...
We will never be together.

No matter how hard I work for achievement
I know I will never be able to match up to your beauty

I went to your school
I went there just to find you
I thought I saw you
It just turned out to be my imagination

People say girls will go crazy over me
I only want you
Yet
We will never be together

When there's a will there's a way?
And what if it all ends in misery?
You should really get out of my live right now
I got no time and place for you...

He told me you are nothing but a slut
I can't agree any better
I know you are way lousy than I imagined you to be
You got many flaws, nothing to be proud of

Yet I going crazy over you.
What wrong with me?

Snsd Genie (Jap Version)

Quote

If we were to achieve something, we have to work for it...

LALALA

Once my blog visits hits a 1000, I shall write about something you guys want to know about me. I shall write whatever you request for truthfully =) Start thinking about the best question you wanna ask/ know about me =)

Wednesday- Pon school whole day for the geo project. Was screw-ed up as expected. We were the least prepared team as far as we could see. They all had posters, decoration, well-rehearsed scripts and beautiful models being displayed. We- nothing. But was kinda relieved that we aren't the last... Came in 8th out of 11th. Pretty impressive for a team that came with nothing to show. Kinda sad that the judges only saw like 1/5 of the video I did. Spent like 6 hours to complete it and yet... Nvrm...

Today- Today really suck. Big time. Lesson + retest till 4.45? Can't go training somemore... Darn the guy that injured me... Maybe it's fate that god want me to rest till my knee fully recover. Actually my knee doesn't hurt anymore but better to be safe than sorry, better not strain it...

My thing injury is getting slightly better. Can walk normally now but definitely can't run yet. Used to think that having an injury is cool but now... NONONO thank you...

Results I got this term is really shitty. Gonna work hard for EOY, but will it be an empty promise again? Only time will show.

Anybody wants to join my study group? I will make it clear first. This group will strictly only study in school, not J8 or library, waste travelling time. Plus, the purpose of it is to allow us to help each other when we dunno how to solve a question and to make the all of us study instead of going home and doing nothing. So any interested mugger?

Will start officially next week. Everyday after school, on days without training. Location is either at 3-4 or study area beside art room. Interested pls tell me=) This group is meant for people that want to do a final push for the EOY.

Hwaiting!

My new quote

We are all simple, we live simple and simple it shall be…

SJII

Went down to SJII today for their training.

Was pretty enjoyable as there was air-con=)

Learnt one very important lesson: Cherish your teammates. Other than Jonathan and the Bryan guy, the rest are, I would say, not up to standard yet... Really start to appreciate all the players in chs after this session!

Was quite impressed with the coach's patience with the player. If I was her, i would have long quitted. She seem to be okay with the training session, not demanding much but teaching them very patiently...

Nites...

Weekends

Weekends just flashed past me once again. At least this weekend has been slightly more meaningful...

Saturday- YOG celebration in the morning. Was excused and stayed in class to do the geo project. Didn't do anything and ended up watching the performance from my class. Miss Naf saw that we did not have a laptop and could not do anything so she wanted all of us to go kenneth house and do the project but me and Nigel managed to give a whole bunch of excuses and were allowed to stay for soccer. Hurray!

First match was against 3-9. Did not play in that game. Was rather close game as it was down to penalties. Alex shot at Samuel and Brendan missed his shot totally and granted us our entry to the next round.

Round 2 was against 3-8. I featured my debut=) Nigel did the 'amazing dribble' past 3 players and scored. Wow. In the midst of the match, 3-8 was suppose to play the ball back to us but Darrall Ong, when hitting the ball back to Samuel to restart the play, slammed the ball into Nigel's face instead. Ouch. Can't really blame him since it's an accident but really couldn't stand what Jordan did. Zhi Qi rushed up to Nigel and checked whether he was okay. Jordan threw the ball at Zhi Qi. WTH. Zhi Qi was only the medic, why drag him into the conflict and who is at fault in the first place? But we did not pursue the matter any further anw.

Finals was against 3-7. They had a rather strong line-up. Nigel was knocked down and 3-7 continued to play but Khiam Li caught them and did a counter attack and scored. They argued that we should have stopped the play when Nigel was down but they were the one that continued the play in the first play. Putting that aside... I scored the second goal!!! Oyeah... Lei Jun then slotted 2 more balls in and made it 4-0. Once, the 3-7 goal keeper tried to act cool after picking up the ball, he turned over and banged into the goalpost. Lol, epic... After conceding 4 goals, 3-7 gave up and substitute 3 sports class players. But still, we scored again and ended the game 5-0. Took and team photo and went back to class to celebrate.

This victory indeed strengthened our class spirit and we were able to bond as one for the first time ever since the start of the year. Khiam Li did great as the captain. He stopped us when the conflict started during our match against 3-8 and made it a point that we do not have to win but to play as a team instead during the finals. He also played every single player and praised us for sticking to the game plan. Maybe I can model him for being such a great captain=) Ty Khiam Li.

After changing, Nigel, Seh Hian and I went to Mac's to have lunch. After that, Nigel and I went to his house. Nigel house is kinda messy but very very clean. After he bathed and ate, we went over to Kenneth's house for the project. Nigel guessed that his unit was on the 10th, but it was actually on the 11th. Quite close anw. Guess what, I spent 5 hours non-stop doing the project. WOW.

Now I can truly say I'm a pro at Movie maker and youtube downloader... Was working on the video introducing the itinerary with MVs such as Lucifer, Sorry Sorry, SEOUL, Tell me your wish, Bo Peep, Cabi and any other k-pop MV you can think of. Was rather funny and interesting. Try to upload if possible some other day.

Went back home and had dinner with my family at 9. Fell asleep immediately once I laid on my bed. Was indeed a very very tiring day...

Sunday.

Woke up and watched TV till lunch. Had sushi/steamboat for lunch. Returned back home and slept till dinner. After dinner, studied SS till now?

Haha, 2morow 'floorball action' with Cren, Derek and Ryan at SJII. Hope it's gonna be fun and... hope my knee doesn't give me any problem. Still have to complete the video during lesson time 2morow and SS test. Gosh, only read through twice. Think I have to memorise it again after this.

Nites!

Yo

Exams are finally over but I'm not even feeling happy, dreading the results...

Played a bit of soccer and went to J8 to shop for stuff for the geo project... Went home after that...

Met up with my parents for dinner.

That's more or less what happened today.

Want to say much more, but I'm afraid I will be called "emotionally unstable"... So, just have to write out everything somewhere else...

Nites.. hiaz

Returning back to old times...

Was on my way back home when I met one of my primary school friend, Scott. Saw him at Bishan already but only managed to muster enough courage to talk to him until the train stopped at Yio Chu Kang. Had a nice little chat with him and realise he didn't change much, just probably more handsome and grown taller.

Wouldn't it be nice if we are could remain the same person we were in primary school? Innocent and carefree... It would really be nice if I could return back to who I was when I was younger.

Was walking to the Bishan Mrt today. I was alone, so i tried ato follow my primary school 'style' of going home. Big strides, rushing home even though there is no apparent rush. I managed to get back that 'feel'. It felt good. Can't describe the feeling but it's like going back to where you were 5 years back. All those fond memories of yourself doing things which are probably considered childish to you by now.

Time indeed past so fast... Even things that I would never think of happening to people around me have happened. Time have changed, we have changed. We all changed, but the crucial point is, whether it's for the better or for the worst?

Life will be perfect if we could rewind everything and start all over again. Then we can all correct our mistakes and lead a perfect life... But mistakes and surprises are what make our lives more interesting, ain't it?

***

Comparing myself now to who I was 3 years ago, I can't help but to feel ashamed of myself. I can hardly believe myself. I've changed so much, from a person which I myself even respect, to somebody i despise. 3 years... I've changed for the worst...

It took me 3 years... 3 years to realise that I'm no longer who I was 3 years ago. I've changed so much that I can hardly accept it.

But all of this is gonna change. I will try, try my very best, to become the Darrell I knew 3 years back. I threw away most of my good traits and inherited bad ones. Time to do a reversal. Drop the bad ones and pick up those good ones...

This time it's gonna be slightly different... cose I'm in a new environment, with new people, new things to do... But I'm going to find back my old self... The one which I myself even admire...

Take some time to think about it. Were you a better person 3 years back when you were in primary school or are you a better person now, or did you not change at all? If you are like me, think about it... What caused all of these and are you gonna do anything about it? Finding back your old self?

***
Procrastinate... That's my weakness...

LOL

Boy: When do you touch yourself the most?


Girl: That's a bit personal...


Boy: At that period of time, were you naked?


Girl: I think so...


Boy: And were you alone?


Girl: Of course...


Boy: And you normally take around 10 to 15 minutes...


Girl: Yea...



Boy: I knew it!!! You touch yourself the most when you bath!

Sometime things are not the way you think it is...

Chio

Damn nice... She's like so damn pretty... That is what I call chio...

I hate myself

Self discipline, the ability to do what is need, to follow the plan...

Self control, the ability to restrain myself from doing things, that occur unexpectedly, which is not part of the plan...

Self-determination, to noy give up doing something easily, to last till the end and not give up

Self confidence, to believe in myself that I can do it, to trust my ability and not doubt it

Self motivation, to encourage myself, to make myself believe that I can do it..


My 5 pointers I keep reminding myself when I'm carrying out my plans...

After 4 days, I came to a conclusion...

I got no self discipline at all...
Self control, even worse still.
Determination, negligible.
Too much self confidence
Too optimistic, too much self motivation till I dunno what am I motivating myself for...

I'm such a loser... I hate myself, I hate myself to be unable to follow my plans.

I got to train myself even further, to have self discipline, self control and determination to carry out my plan, then with some self confidence and motivation, then can I finish what I set out to do.

C'mon Darrell!!! Don't be a loser!!!! I'm a winner!!!

20 thing u should know about me...

Here are a list of 20 things which you should know about me:


1) I'm a big fan of SNSD!! Jessica, Tiffany and Tae Yeon are my favourites...


2) I love chocolate!!! All kind!!!


3) I'm a K-pop'rian...


4) I love floorball!!!


5) I love to swim, although I don't really swim nowdays. FYI, I started swimming in P2, coompleted 'Gold' and 'life saving 3' at P4, joined a swimming club 'Swim Knights' at P5 and entered competitive swimming. Trained daily except weekends for 3 hours daily, really very tiring. Didn't excel in swmming, was only above average. Continued till pre-PSLE. Stop swimming ever since...


6) I love to read, esp Anthony Horowitz books and Maximum Ride series. Love all spying/agent/intelligence/exciting storyline books. Huge reader in primary school... During primary school, could read up to 35 books during EOY break...


7) Favourite bubble tea is Oreo.


8) Plays dota. Favourite heroes are --> Axe, Yunero, Storm. Not very good at it but enjoy it though... But can easily own Cren's balls~


9) Very positive about everything!!! At least, most of the times...


10) Priorities in life is: Family and Friends, Passion (floorball), Future(studying).


11) Plans to represent my nation in the future!! Salute.


12) Love to spend money on things that are worth it to me.


13) Not planning to hav a GF till duno when...


14) Favourite pastime is sleeping...


15) Hates it when ppl are selfish or self-centered...


16) Dun like to rely too much on electronic devices...


17) Doesn't pick up calls or reply immediately since phone is often in slient or in the bag.


18) Tend to be late in the morning.


19) Have a personal set of life theory and principles.


20) Doesn't eat fastfood unless forced to, except KFC. I mean, how can you live without it's chicken for more than a month? I will die!


That's more or less things you should know about me...


Nites...

!!!

I will stop ************!!!!!!!!!

Choices

If you can change 1 thing in your life right now,what would it be?

.......

For me, I will remain as how things are right now...

What we have became today is the result of the many choices we had to make during our lives...

Don't wish for anything more or less, cose~ this might be the best result you will ever get.

Be contempted with what you have now. You never know how your life would screw up if any single aspect in your life changes.

The decision you have made in the past are based on what you were thinking then, which of course, may not be the most informed choice but just remember, you made the decision and you made the right decision. No regrets...


Regretting is part of life

Regretting wasting time on regretting is the only reason we should regret

But wasting time on regretting on wasting time on regretting makes it no better

So, quit regretting,

Cose~ You've always been making the right choice to become who you are today

Any slight change in your life right now can just screw you up.


* For those that dun understand. For eg, you wish you had better floorball skills. Your life made a major change now. You are in combined schools, you spend even more time on floorball everyday, you start to get arrogant, you want to get a better stick to match your skills, you rise up to captain and take up more responsibility. You become popular and spend time with your friends then your family and studies. You play in Div 1 and get injured.

Result ( After being better in floorball): No time, get arrogant, want to buy new stick, take up captain's responsibility, spend more time with friends, lesser time with family. Studies screw up cose no time study, get injured in the end, so no more floorball.

SO better floorball skills makes your life better? Think again? I believe all of us are the best we can get, dun try to overdo stuff and end up screwing up your life. The life we have right now is the best and the most suitable one. Don't try to jump steps, you will end up falling. Follow the rules, one step at a time. Nobody can change overnight, you want to have better floorball skills, even if god grants you the wish, you will screw up your life ( like the scenario above). If you want to have good floorball skills and not screw up your life, train harder. You will spend more time, but you will learn to adapt in the process and cope with it. When your good enough, you can then have good floorball skills and not screw up your life. Work hard, one step at a time...

What we are today are the choices we have made in the past. Should I play floorball, should I study harder, should I make friends with him? Remember, whatever choice you made, it was the best one. You want to improve your life? One step at a time. We achieve what we achieved if through gradual hardwork and effort, not something that we can obtain overnight. Success takes time to build up...

I suggest, don't ever regret your choice and stop dreaming, start working towards your dreams...

Nites...

Blood pledge rocks...